A Little Bit Caotic

Thursday 11 Aug 2011. Ho Chi Minh City.

The Reunification Hall, Ho Chi Minh City

Prior to our Air Asia plane touching down on Tan Son Nhat airpport I can see that HCMC is really densely populated but organized. There are houses and buildings everywhere my eyes can see. Not many roads though, and vehicles on the roads are slow-going. I would later find out that the Vietnam population is about 87 million.

HCMC is 1 hour in time behind KL and 3 hours behind that of Melbourne. By the time I get through customs and immigration and out of the airport with my luggage it is already 5.30pm. I get on an airport cab in the taxi line outside the arrival hall and head on out to Sophia Hotel in District 1. It is located right in the tourist area and is close by to several major landmarks such as the Rex Hotel, the Caravelle Hotel, The Reunification Center, Notre Dame Cathedral, and the Ben Thanh Market.

Checking into Sophia is painless and I settle in to my room and begin finding my feet in the city. A city I knew well, and a city I want to spend a few days in before going across the border to Cambodia. Find Sophia on Agoda.com and they are located at 36 Thai Van Lung, Ben Nghe, District 1, HCMC. Tel: (08) 38256972.

Dinner is at Pho 2000 just around the corner from Sophia. I try their beef pho which is quite small portion and so I order a few Vietnamese shrimp spring rolls and wash it down with Vietnamese black coffee. The pho is so so compared to what we have in Melbourne which has a large population of Vietnamese. My bill comes to VND (Dong) 114,000 and at 1 US$ to VND 20,000 the meal is all right.

View outside my room window

Comfortable bed

I go around Sophia to stretch my legs and also to find my bearing. Sophia is on Thai Van Lung St and it is at one end of District 1. I pay US$104.55 for 3 nights. Sophia is close to a Shop & Go convenience store and surprise, surprise; a Pizza Hut, a Coffee Bean, and a couple of spas. Nice. I popped into Royal Spa nearby to have a foot massage them make my way to the more touristy part of District 1 to have a look around. On the way back to Sophia I chanced upon this little cafe called Phuc Long for a Vietnamese coffee with condensed milk. Heavens. At VND 23,000 ($1 and a bit) it was great. Find it on 63 Mac Thi Buoi-P, District 1.

So that is it for the 1st day in Vietnam.

I decide to hunker down for the night, satisfied that I have made it to HCMC. Even though I have been to this country on numerous business trips before I am still looking forward to my solo journey here, wanting more, yearning for the independence and personal space ......

Solo Trip

Oh... blissful thought, if not for the world financial crisis, of being able to go to another place on earth on your own. Haha, such is the way we are dealt with in life?

Although it is only HCM city which I have been several times in the past years I still relish the idea of solo travels. I look forward to waking up to the bustle of bikes + goings on in this lively city. And I look forward to my croissant + dripped Viet coffee with condensed milk and ice!

Later on in the week a friend of mine is going to meet me up in Phnom Penh whilst I would bus across the Vietnam border into Cambodia for a rendezvous.

Rendezvous in PP you ask? Sounds a bit off and a bit investigative.

More to come on my sojourn......

Picture shows a group photo of former 1978 classmates who attended a dinner hosted by the family of Ek Kok to remember him on his first anniversary. Dinner was held on 10/8/2011 at a vegetarian restaurant in Damansara.

Happy Birthday Butterfly

I will run to you

Heroes come in many colors

OUR CAR WAS PARKED on Victoria Parade on Saturday and this errant P-Plater reversed his/her car into ours, damaging the car rego plate.

The episode was witnessed by a passer-by and she wrote a note and tuck it on our windscreen. I texted her and thanked her for her willingness to help and her sense of social justice. The world is certainly a better place with people like her!

(I am not so sure if I would take the trouble to do what she did. Heroes come in many colors)

A wake-up call

It’s written by a former nurse that worked in palliative care. It was a staggering reminder of how mindful and deliberate you need to be about creating the life you deserve and not settling for the life you have.

Regrets of the Dying

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared.

I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives. People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learned never to underestimate someone’s capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though , every one of them.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again.

Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people have had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.

It is very important to try and honour at least some of your dreams along the way. From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret. But as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence. By simplifying your lifestyle and making conscious choices along the way, it is possible to not need the income that you think you do. And by creating more space in your life, you become happier and more open to new opportunities, ones more suited to your new lifestyle.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result. We cannot control the reactions of others. However, although people may initially react when you change the way you are by speaking honestly, in the end it raises the relationship to a whole new and healthier level. Either that or it releases the unhealthy relationship from your life. Either way, you win.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved.

Everyone misses their friends when they are dying. It is common for anyone in a busy lifestyle to let friendships slip. But when you are faced with your approaching death, the physical details of life fall away. People do want to get their financial affairs in order if possible. But it is not money or status that holds the true importance for them. They want to get things in order more for the benefit of those they love. Usually though, they are too ill and weary to ever manage this task. It is all comes down to love and relationships in the end. That is all that remains in the final weeks, love and relationships.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called "comfort" of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to themselves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again. When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.

Life is a choice. It is YOUR life. Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly. Choose happiness.

*Bronnie Ware is a writer, singer/songwriter, and speaker from Australia. She has lived nomadically for most of her adult life. From being a corporate employee to nursing the dying, teaching songwriting in a women’s prison among others, she gained wide and rare experience in having close contact with people who were a few weeks to cross over to the other side(dead). She wrote the " Top Five Regrets of the Dying" from her experience.

Visit Inspiration and Chai

Vietnamese Broken Rice Dinner

Vietnamese spring rolls

Vietnamese Broken Rice with pan-fried pork chops, a fried egg, shredded pork skins 猪皮 and cucumber. Special fish sauce is poured over the rice and condiments and mixed together well before eating

SM baked a cake for the dinner

WE WERE AT MARY AND JIM'S GLEN WAVERLEY HOME for dinner. This was planned a week ago when we had home-cooked pho. Mary is a cook cook. I requested Vietnamese Broken rice 越南碎米饭 and it was something we had before and enjoyed.

One other pleasant surprise was we were also served Vietnamese spring rolls which are basically shredded chicken with Vietnamese mint, vermicelli, and cooked prawns wrapped in Vietnamese rice papers. How we eat is we dip them into a bowl of fish sauce mixed with peanuts and chili.

One of the things we talked about was how hard life was in Saigon back in 1975. Mary's parental family had had a big piece of land near Da Nang which they had to forgo when the commies confiscated South Vietnamese people's properties. She still has the land title but it is now a waste paper.

Life was very hard.........

Nice Day Out

SATURDAY 5 MARCH 2011. NICE DAY. 23 degrees, very sunny. We went to Vic Market to get the usual seafood, veg, fruits, cheese, bread, ham, eggs. Mom and dad came with us and we had a nice lunch near the Market. Had our latte's and lemingtons.

Off to get the stuff whilst mom and dad waited for us.

All done in 2 hours. Vic Market was chock-a-block with people. Shoppers, locals, tourists, gawkers, people walking in fast paces, toing and froing. Busy little spot. And I did not even have my usual favorite, bratwurst with mild mustard and fried onion. I don't like sauerkraut.

My favorite bratwurst stall is the Melbourne Bratwurst Shop. It's at 99 Queen Victoria Market. Phone No: 03 9328 2076.

My favorite part of QVM - the delis. I bought some d'affinois cheese today. D'affinois is a French double-cream soft cheese made from cow's milk. It is produced by the Fromagerie Guilloteau company

See French Moments Sydney site for more info on d'ffanois cheese. You will love it.

Off to mom and dads to drop them off and to get some chili plants.

Nice antique car. Could not see what make because it was on the fast lane doing > 100kph. Must have had a different engine mounted in from its original?

We had our lunch in a restaurant along Elizabeth St. It was sunny and we decided to have our meals alfresco.

WHAT DO PEOPLE LIVE FOR? A Journey

Friend, Butterfly, sent me this clip. I have seen it a few times and somehow the clip (What do people live for) struck a huge cord with me .....

What do people live for? I know this is a cliche topic/title. Many will scoff and say "oh yeah, what do ya know?!"

"Yeah, yeah, here he goes again!".

I may be thinking differently for the past 3 years because I am over the hill now and I am looking at life in a slightly different light. I would not say that my dreams are extraordinary. I certainly have not been able to live my dreams yet.

Or do I know absolutely what I am living for? This is a BIG TOPIC that all of us including me, constantly grapple with.

I am just like you. I am looking, feeling, searching, experiencing, it's a great journey.....


I see my dad who is 83 years old. I have never discussed with him what his dreams are. I do not know if he wants to talk about it. I am sure he is comforted that his family is well. He is very committed to his art of writing documentaries and he has a wide social circle. He loves his family. I am sure he looks back on his life and he is happy with some of the things he has achieved in his life.

The point is God willing I will be 83 years old one day and I hope by then I would have lived my life (more fully than I have now) and seen some of my dreams come true .....

Family, friends and our loved ones are what make our dreams come true ....... I hope we can love them and cherish them more ....... before it's too late..... the clip is simple yet sends a powerful message.

Part 2

He is 81 yo. His wife is gone. One other friend when they were young is also gone. Out of 7 in the group there are 5 left.

They are no longer youthful, they are sick in their bodies, they are dumb founded and at a lost. They meet and are sour. Enough is enough. They go back to their dream.

For 6 months they get themselves ready

Then they set off, on their bikes; from North to South, from day to night, 13 days around the Taiwan Island, 1139 km, for one simple reason.........

TO RE-LIVE THEIR YOUTHFUL DAYS

TO REMEMBER THE DEPARTED FRIENDS

TO SAY YES TO LIFE

TO LIVE THEIR DREAM

Once A Scout, Always A Scout

Capt. Miraz is a flight instructor but also a King Scout and a Karate 1st Dan holder. He is enthusiastic and energetic in pursuing his interests.

I promised him in January that I would go look for evidence of my scouting days such as a photo, a letter of commendation, proficiency badges etc. I was happy yesterday that I chanced upon these badges that I had kept all this while since 1978. Wow, that was 33 years ago.... I am so glad to see and to touch these mementos because they remind me of my childhood.

The memorabilia has been kept in this old tin container for the past 33 years

I was also going through my boxes of things as I packed them away in September last year and now that I am back I want to get to a few things that I need. As it is, I cannot find the items.

The old wife says "don't go looking for them because they will turn up one day".

But I explain to her "I want these items now because I have use for them!". Sigh!

The top badge (Green background with the gold crown) is the King Scout Badge I earned back in 1976. The bottom left badge is the "Tenderfoot" Badge, and the bottom right badge is the Perak state badge

King Scouts back in 1976. I was 3rd from left

All the other proficiency badges I earned during my time as a scout.

Dinner at Wantirna

SM'S FRIEND LING CHEW INVITED US FOR CNY STEAMBOAT DINNER at their home in Wantirna. She invited her cousins + family as well. How sweet is the little girl, Natalie! Well we have beef, pork, chicken, lamb, tofu, mushrooms, cabbage, eggs, fish meatballs, pork meatballs. The chicken stock is very good which makes a great deal of difference.

Prawn Mee lunch

WE WENT OUT TO SISTER'S PLACE for lunch. Prawn mee, made by Lee. Nice. He showed us a tomato plant that he didn't grow. It just grows by itself out from the compost bin!

Lee reckons there are 40-50 fruits and so we might try growing some tomatoes in May.

BACK OF MY HOUSE

NEVER REALLY APPRECIATE my rear decking at night. Took some shots and felt that it was quite enchanting. Would be nice to sit out the back sometimes and appreciate life as it goes by ....